Merry Meet all,
I have returned from my social media break – though now I am only really on Twitter and Instagram properly now. I do have a facebook but it is private and only for family.
I have removed many people from my life – old friends, newer friends, pagan friends – not because I don’t care for them, but more that I care for my own mental health and wellbeing more. I suffer with Anxiety and the constant stream of the “newsfeed” was too much. Watching others do things I no longer can, or that we had planned to do together but never did, set my anxieties and worries off. I began to feel low and disconnected. I felt like Celtic Moon had failed and friendships had been forgotten after the birth of our daughter, which I couldn’t understand. But then I too have made changes in my life so now I have a fresh perspective, and I am happy for all those who I no longer follow every second of every day. I am sure they are all happy and blessed which is all I have ever wanted for them. I hope they are pleased for my own found happiness too.
I have found my break away has been refreshing and a real eye opener as to what truly matters in life and what does not – Facebook is not a priority!
My priorities are my family, my spirituality, my work and the future that I wish to have.
I am going through a very introspective period in my life where I am focusing on me – that means I don’t have the time and energy to devote to anyone but the closest of friends. Acquaintances, work colleagues, old school friends and pagans I’ve met over the years are still in my heart and mind, still in my positive thoughts and prayers, but not within my inner circle of family and bonded buddies.
I have found an inner freedom and internal peace from this – living my way, never expecting too much of myself yet still setting high goals for happiness, a reduction in anxiety and in letting my life revolve around those closest to my heart.
Last Summer my Soul Sister Moonstream and I visited Glastonbury Avalon for a Pilgrimage.
Part of that Pilgrimage was dedicated to my own self-healing and emotional recovery.
I forgave others, I forgave myself, I made conscious decisions to cleanse myself of my bruised ego and concentrate on joy, peace and love.
Since then, I have had a growing sense of peace. Like loose ends had been tied, and permission given to move forward.
Imbolc has just passed us, and with the renewing energies of Spring just awakening, I am being reborn into the Love and protection of The Goddess and her Loving Consort.
In celebration of this, and a gift for my 30th Birthday which was at Samhain, my soul sister brought us back to Avalon for another Spiritual pilgrimage.
We arrived in Avalon with the familiar “coming home” butterflies in our bellies, and proceeded to head up the Spiral Path and journey to the summit of the beautiful Tor. The embodiment of The Lady in the land of Avalon.
We talked as we walked – about my Daughter, Moonstream’s spiritual godchild, about Moonsteam’s holistic hopes for the future, of dreams and achieving things we want despite setbacks.
As we walked, my knee and hip ached and my lungs filled with ice cold air – but the spring Sun was warm and constant and the blue skies willed us onward and upward.
When we reached the top we took time to enjoy the awe-inspiring view.
On our last visit I left a spell and crystal – buried on the Tor for protection – I felt its energies re-affirmed with our presence there.
Feeling our first spiritual achievement of the pilgrimage had been met, we made our way back down the Tor to Chalice Well gardens to enjoy some much needed time in quiet contemplation, amongst the flowers and fellow pilgrims, beside the flowing healing waters of the Red Well.
We found Brighid’s blanket of Imbolc Snowdrops, and Daffodils so yellow they paled the sun above us.
We meditated beside the well head – first alone, then with some silent kindred sisters.
I lit a Flame of Avalon, and charged some of my dedicated Avalon crystals on the Well-Head’s makeshift Altar.
During my meditation I had an unexpected visit from Grandmother Crow. She appeared in visualisation, a little more nude than her last visit.
Artist currently unknown – Image found through Google Image search
She told me to look at her and to examine her body. She showed me the lines from carrying children, the sag of her stomach from the birthgiving and “enjoying sustenance”, she showed me her breasts – heavy and gravitationally challenged – no long pert and smooth as in her youth. She told me to see the wrinkles on her body and the veins of her lifeblood that were ever present on her pale aged skin – like blue woad patterns woven into her being. Her hair long and grey – stripped of colour, but not of life.
I asked her why she wanted to show me this – what did it mean?
“Am I not beautiful child? As I am?”
I had to admit, she was. Confident in her own beauty and with a soulful reverence for each mark, scar, wrinkle and roll-line – she was beautiful.
“If you accept that this is beautiful, with all that you see, then you must accept your own beauty and be happy and confident in who you are also.”
And boom. Just like that, Grandmother Crow tells me to shut up, fix up, shake myself and stop being so unconfident in who I am and how I look.
The Divine Feminine making her message clear when it is was needed.
Even though this was not my line of thinking as I sat in reverence at the Well head… It was a message I definitely needed to hear.
I spent alot of time thinking about archetypes and aspects of the Goddess and how it relates to my life at this moment in time – Grandmother Crow was encouraging me to find the Queen within and accept that I am allowed to be Happy with who I am and have confidence in myself and my abilities.
I have kept this feeling with me since her visit at the well head.
After some time, Moonstream and I awoke naturally from Meditation together and went to sit within the Ivy Bower beside the Angel figurehead.
Flowers had been left in offering before our visit. I left a green aventurine disc – a request made at the well-head. Moonstream wrote out a sympathetic request for the universe, and attached it to the bough.
After collecting Water at the Lion’s head font, we walked up to the sun-basked meadow and sat together on a swinging bench looking up at the expanse of the Tor and the bright blue sky.
Again we talked, and relaxed together in contented silence, both appreciating the time to just “be” – to be at Peace, to relax, to hit pause on the world for that small space of time. It was wonderful.
Together we walked to King Arthur’s court and Blessed sacred jewellery and stones in the Waterfall flow, before taking our time to appreciate the peace of the garden at the Vesica Pool.
We bid the Gardens a farewell feeling Blessed, at Peace, Spiritually cleansed and recharged.
After a relaxing evening in our hotel with hot baths, colouring, reading and writing we had a deep nights sleep.
On the second day of our pilgrimage we woke slowly and enjoyed the peace of not “having” to go anywhere in a rush.
After a hearty breakfast, we headed into town. Starting at the church on top of the hill (where we witnesses the colourful funeral of a local busker – pony and trap, flowers, a Scottish piper and a myriad of alternatively clothed individuals) we made our way down one side of the high street in search of incense and for Moonstream idea-inspiring books!
By the time we got to the Speaking Tree we were both cold and in need of a sit down (we spent a LONG time looking at books!) so we headed to the Blue Note cage for epic hot chocolates!
Once finished here we visited the Goddess Temple gifts shop and StarChild (a must if only to enjoy their incense of the day!)
Once finished there we headed up to the Goddess Temple itself. (All Temple Images are stock internet images as we did not take photographs).
This visit, the Temple was decorated in Honour of Brighid and Imbolc.
Beautiful white cloth and silks were hung around the space, shrouding the Morgan statues like a thin veil of mist.
The main altar had a new artwork by Tiana – Bridie the swan maiden – at the centre (see above image bottom second from left), with images of the Goddess of the Sacred Flame on either side.
The great calendar Altar had been moved to an image of Brighid with her Flame and her guardian Wolf.
The Morgans themselves were still arranged in the comforting enclosure of a sisterly circle. A beautiful artwork of Brighid, bare-breasted in from of the Tor with a Flame in her hands looked over the circle of meditation cushions and the central Morgan Altar with all of the statues of each of the Sister Morgens.
I chose to sit on the blue cushions before Morgan Gliten – the Morgan of Water – the Mermaid Morgan if you will!
Moonstream sat beneath the artwork of Brighid with her oracle cards.
Before me I laid out my Avalon crystal, my Lady of Avalon palm stone and a large tear-drop of Purple Fluorite.
As I meditated, I allowed the energies of the Morgans of Avalon to flow into my crystals and charge them.
As I meditated, the beautiful Goddess chants played by the Temple Melissa filled my head and my heart. A Chant for Bridie began, and sat beneath her Image in the Temple dresses just for her, I felt Blessed by Brighid. I gave thanks to her with prayers I had written in my pocket book of shadows – my mini Pagan bible.
Then I closed my eyes and began a deep meditation. A chant for Domnu began – Goddess of the Ocean. I felt my heart lift. This chant soon turned into one dedicated to Yemaya – a yoruban goddess of the sea and oceans. The Mermaid Goddesses were very strong!
Goddess Domnu by Tiana
I visualised myself swimming underwater – a huge blue mermaid’s tail propelling me along. I felt free. I felt at peace. I felt beautiful. I felt strong. I felt the coolness of the water on my skin, tasted the salt on mty lips and felt the sun’s rays penetrating the water to light my face as I swam.
It was wonderful.
This pilgrimage had been dedicated to Brighid and the Lady of Avalon, but Yemaya seemed to be reminding me that She and I have unfinished business.
My Temple visitation has now given me the kick to ensure I explore this further!
After nearly 40 minutes within the Morgan circle, I left my soul sister in meditation and went to kneel at the calendar altar to Brighid – again giving prayers from my personal grimoire.
When I finishes there, I joined Moonstream on beautiful purple cushions to the right of the main Temple Altar.
We were joined by a woman and her son who must have been about 6 years old, a meditating man who moved his hands in what looked like a series of mudhras, a buxom lady in red who bowed before Brighid’s altar in reverence before writing in her own journal, and a flurry of others who came and went as we sat in peaceful meditation and contemplation.
I lit a candle on the Altar in thanksgiving and asking for Brighid to allow me to rededicate myself as her Priestess.
Even without Celtic Moon, I still intend to spiritually teach and serve my Patron Goddess in the years to come. I also re-affirmed my role as a self-taught Priestess of Avalon – Blessed by Avaloniya and her Sisterhood of Morgens.
I made notes in my journal and contemplated receiving a smudging.
As I did this, a lady in green had a smudging herself. She was followed by the buxom red maiden.
I turned to my spiritual sister and asked her if she would like to receive a smudging together – to further bond us together and almost as an offering to the Goddess.
We spoke to the Temple Melissa who encouraged us to hold hands as she Blessed us. Her name was Mary and she wore one of the sacred shawls with beautiful green feathers on – it was made by the same lady who made my Owl shawl.
She uses feathers to waft the white sage around us. She told us to leave behind whatever we no longer needed and to move forward in joy and happiness. She told us to remember that we are loved, and to hug one another to affirm our spiritual bond. We hugged, with the Temple Melissa, who offered us her own Blessings alongside the energy of the Lady of Avalon.
It was perfect.
We both left the Temple feeling connected, emotional, on the verge of tears – but Happy ones.
We returned to the high street in search of more incense, and in one of the stores we met a woman who was offering alternative hair braiding.
The last time Moonstream and I journeyed here together I marked it by getting my nose pierced. This time I decided to get Mermaid-inspired hair braids to mark our visit (and in Honour of Domnu, Yemaya & Gliten and their blessings in the Temple).
From there we enjoyed a drink and a rest in the George & Pilgrim before heading to the White Well.
I took offerings for both Herne and Brighid’s Altars, as well as 3 glass vials to collect some water from the White Well.
We began at Herne’s Altar.
I gave prayers of thanks for his fulfilling of my wishes at my last pilgrimage here. I Thanked him for the transformation of my emotions in regard to certain situations in my life.
I burned incense for him, wafting it around the altar and before the image of him as Lord of the Wildwood.
I then gave a disc of amethyst to his altar and gave prayers for my husband. The content of these prayers I will not share in detail – but as Lord of all man he is the deity most suited to helping my husband explore his role in life and the journey ahead of him. To understand his role as Father, Lover, Husband and Care-giver, as well as finding himself and exploring his own soul further.
I left his Altar feeling the same surety that I had on my previous visit.
I filled my glass vials with water from the White Well pool, and made my way to Brighid’s Altar.
Again I gave thanks to her just as I had in the Goddess Temple, and recited again the Charge of the Priestess and my dedication to her.
I gave a disc of Rose Quartz this time, and offered prayers for my Daughter Willow – that she may grow protected and blessed in the Love of the Goddess just as I have been, that she may be safe and strong and happy, and that she feels Loved beyond all other things. I thanked Brighid for all that she gives to us as a family, and for Blessing the bond between us as a family.
Finally I gave Thanks to the Spirit of the Well, washing my hands in the pool, and anointing my third eye chakra with the Blessed Healing waters.
Moonstream worked her own personal Magick at each of the Altars, and I gave her a vial to collect her own White Well Water as well.
Together we left the Well house feeling at Peace, and thankful for such a wonderful chance to indulge in our spirituality together.
Another evening of sacred music, hot baths, reading and writing – with good food and beer for good measure followed by an extremely restorative and deep nights sleep.
We spent time on the pilgrimage discussing our hopes and desires for the future – including some exciting spiritual projects for us both (alone and together!) as well as making a plan for another visit in the summer with another friend of ours.
All in all I have come away feeling restored. The Divine Feminine and Her Sacred Consort have infused me with a deep peace, determination and a spiritual Harmony that has enveloped me and reinvigorated my soul in perfect love and perfect trust.
May the Lady and her Love Bless you all!